Thursday, August 8, 2013

a day in the life - Melissa Working Mama Post

I get a lot of people telling me all the time that I am super mommy...
what I say about this is that all mama's are super mama's if you work outside of the home or not...parenting is hard, but the most rewarding job as well! 

Thanks for stopping by and reading my working mama post! 
I will try not to make this too long... but it probably will be... 

Life with two boys:
First I will tell you that I feel like I can balance both of my boys now, but when Crew was first born it was a challenge.  It was trial and error but I learned a lot and became a better mama because of it.  Parenting is trail and error I just try my best to live each day showing my boys I love and care for them.  I learned limits with both boys over this past year.  I learned that I can't always be the "good guy" or "friend" to Grayson all the time.  I need to show him that there are rules and we must follow them.  This was a BIG one for me.  I always tried to comprise with Grayson but as he has gotten older I have learned that this doesn't work all the time and he needs to know that mama is the boss.  IT was a big learning over the past year.  Adding another baby was also a new adventure.  My advice her is to live each day to the fullest you can with your newborn.  Get in as many snuggles you can. Cherish those moments, don't wish them away.  Each day will be a new adventure embrace it and learn as you go.  There is no road map or instructions on how to parent with a newborn and a 2 year old.  Looking back I remember how stressful it was, but I did take the time to cherish every quiet moment I had with Crew.  IF that meant rocking him and holding him longer just so I could be with him more I did just that... What I am trying to say is sometimes the little things in everyday life sneak in and say you need to be doing this instead of being with your babies.  I usually made the decision to be with my babies because they are only small once.  If it meant staying up late to get household or additional work duties done I did just that.  This does not mean I am super mom it just means it was my decision and I look back through pictures mostly this year and I can remember all those late nights and those early mornings.  Crew was not the best sleeper until he was about 11 months old... I remember some nights when I was up with him folding laundry or putting away laundry it was a quiet task when everyone else was sleeping.  My last word on this subject is this, you can do it!  Believe in yourself, don't be hard on yourself, let things go, and remember everything will be okay.  You will survive!  

a few notes about me:
Since I don't blog as often as I would like too... a lot of people that follow me on instagram say all the time to me is how to do keep your house so clean etc.  
First I am going to tell you that I am type A, my husband is as well.  I like a clean and an organized house.  I have to have every bed made in our house before I leave for the day.  It is a habit something that I have done for years.  Ask any friend that has been to my house it is always clean... 
I like going to bed knowing that my house is organized and clean.  Every toy in the playroom has a home... why... because Grayson will ask me about a toy he is looking for and if it is in the right spot I can show him exactly where it is at.  He is slowly catching onto the fact that certain things go in certain places.  You can call me weird... 
You may say to your self... is her house EVER messy...yes it is.  I do let my boys play and make messes.  I just make sure that when we are done playing that we ALL pick up.  
Okay now that you know that about me I will share with you how I get things done during our short time at home in the morning and our time in the evening before bed. 

Our Morning:
I try to get up before the boys each morning.  I usually start my day at 6AM or earlier if Crew gets me up.  If I can get ready before the boys get up it makes for an easy morning, but sometimes that just doesn't happen.  I usually get my shower in before Crew is up at least.  If Crew is up with me I usually give him the iPad and a bottle of milk so I can finish getting ready for work.  Most of the time he usually comes over and sits on my lap while I get ready and plays in my makeup bag.  He basically just plays in our bathroom while I get ready.  If both boys are up and I still need to get ready I make them both breakfast and they sit and eat while watching cartoons.  I quickly put on my makeup during this time.  My boys are slow eaters so I have time to do several tasks before cleaning up breakfast and putting dishes away.  Once they are down with breakfast I usually clean up the kitchen and they are running around the house playing or asking me for something... it is a different story each day.  If my bed is not made the boys help me make it and than we head upstairs where I blow dry my hair and finish getting ready for the day.  I usually clean up their rooms and get their clothes out for the day while we are upstairs as well.  While I am getting ready the boys play in their playroom.  I do make several stops in the process of getting ready because the boys need me or they want me to play superheros with them.  I do what I have to do so I can get ready for work.  Sometimes if my boys are not in good moods and are fighting etc I pull my hair up in a bun and finish drying my hair at work.  {only person in my office so I can do this...ha!}
So if you can see us in our house I basically leave our house clean each morning... type A remember.... 

How do I get laundry done:
I figured this out a long time ago... when I get up in the morning I start a load of laundry if it is needed I am able to put that load of laundry in the dryer before we leave.  I usually end up folding that load before going to bed.  Otherwise sometimes I start laundry right when we get home from school/work.  I have three laundry baskets in our house.  They are sorted by colors, whites, and towels.  That way all I have to do is take that laundry basket to the laundry room and start it.  My husband is a GREAT help at laundry.  He sometimes starts a load before he leaves for work at 6AM.  My husband and I balance and help each other out when it comes to household duties.  When I fold clothes I have a basket for the boys clothes and a basket for our clothes that way I can take that basket upstairs and put their clothes away.  I usually put the clothes away when the boys are upstairs with me playing.  It doesn't take much time and than I am able to be with them and get this task completed.  That way I am not doing so much after they go to bed or during the weekend.  I usually like to have tasks like laundry done before the weekend.  

How do I get dishes done and the dishwasher emptied:
this is an easy one - I unload the dishwasher after the boys eat breakfast or while they are eating.  As for dishes after every meal I clean as I prepare the meal etc.  I don't have a sink full of dishes.
Clean as you go!

Chaos after school and preparing for dinner:
My boys always want dinner right away when we get home.  I usually get them both settled at the kitchen island and prepare dinner while they are having fruit or a light snack before I finish up their dinner.  For Crew I usually give him milk or fruit and Grayson I usually give him water or milk and fruit or cheese whichever one he prefers.  Shortly after that I give them their meals...
they eat I clean up the bags and my work stuff I brought home that is sitting by the back door and I get the bathroom ready for bath time. 
I am sure by now you can gather that I pre-plan the next step before it happens.  It helps me not feel stressed and I can enjoy moments with the boys.  
Call me crazy if you want... 
As for dinner for Chad and I, I usually wait until he gets home so he can help me out.  I feed and give the boys baths most nights before Chad gets home from work.  
Once Chad is home he plays with the boys and I cook us dinner.  This means that we do have a later dinner, but I would rather have that than not have this moment at all with Chad.  
Most times when we eat the boys are playing on the deck outside or sitting at the kitchen island with us. 

Spending quality time with the boys:
I think that I do a great job of spending every moment I can with my boys. Since I don't see them much during the day I try to make it ALL about them when we are at home together.  We dance, we sing, we have horsey rides, we play superheros, we play doctor, we play with their train table, and all of the toy trucks and cars they have.  We play in their bounce house most nights after bath.  We go on walks.  We snuggle, we hug, we kiss, we laugh.  We have quiet time, one on one time, and we live life to the fullest.  I know that my boys love me and knowing that makes my heart FULL! 

Spending quality time with my husband:
Keeping it real... this has been a department that both my husband and I are working on.  It took a TOUGH conversation and being REAL with one another for us to turn a page in the right direction, but it happened and because of this I am forever grateful that my husband as an open heart and was and is willing to listen.  
It doesn't have to be a GRAND plan to spend time with your husband it can be simple... one of the simplest things that Chad and I now do is sit out back and talk about our day and have a glass a wine after the kids go to bed or we watch our favorite show together before bed without phones or computers.  
For me and my husband it is a work in progress and the first step is making each other aware of our wants and needs.  We got caught up in life with two boys and forgot about us as husband and wife.  IT happens!  We are all human and we all make mistakes.  We are learning and we are making changes to this day!  
keeping it real... I am not perfect!  But I do vow to be a better wife! 

 Spending quality time with friends:
We have dinner with our best friends every Friday night.  It is great to connect with them.  We try to have our friends over to spend time with them or we simply get together at a local restaurant or we have play dates with their kids.  Most of our friends have kids so it makes it easy... 
We just try to make time for friends because to us friends are like family to us.  We don't have either one of our parents living in the same town so we rely on our friends just as we would our family.  
I try to make an effort to connect with friends either by text or a quick phone chat.  It is nice in the world of social media that I some what know what is going on with my friends and family.  
I am a BIG fan of instagram!  
Improvements and finding a balance in life:
I think there is always room for improvement... you may think that I am crazy and I am NEVER sleep but I do because of the world I have created around me I am use to doing what I do each day.  I like an organized life. 
It is my type A personality, but I have learned since having my two boys that living in the moment is so important and I believe that I do this each day!

Paying bills etc...
I usually pay bills and take care of other household duties during lunch.  Sometimes on the weekend I do these things during the boys nap time.  I just find the time and get it done.

I promise I do sleep I just GO all day long until I lay my head on the pillow to sleep.    

 I have a wonderful job and I love it!  I satisfies my professional career and gives me a great work/family balance.  I feel blessed each and every day for my job and my family! 

Thanks for stopping by a reading about a day in the life with me :) 
Most days I am in survival mode... 
Have a blessed weekend!  Come back Monday for our FIRST guest post!


Sara! said...

Love this post, Melissa!! I follow you on Instagram (sjjbrown), and I definitely agree that you find plenty of time to spend with the boys!!! You seem like a great mama!

Miranda said...

I loved this post :) I'm going to be going BACK to work before too long, and I've forgotten how to handle both - work & motherhood. This gave me the motivation and the encouragement I needed to KNOW I can do it, and still be organized, etc :)

Sara Moon said...

I loved this!!! I definitely haven't read many working Mom posts. I'm an elementary school counselor so being home in the summer and going back to work definitely proves that working is so much harder with a baby. I completely agree that organization and balance are the keys to success. Thanks for all the helpful hints!

Kiersten said...

You are so organized! I love it. I need to get better about cleaning as I go... it's always my goal, but then at the end of the night there is always still a mess and I'm exhausted and sometimes it just doesn't get done. But, I'm feeling more motivated than ever after reading this!

Heather said...

This is a great post. You are blessed!

Tiffany said...

I am so glad I found your blog! I have a 20 month old and my husband and I both work full time, but our schedules are conflicting. I have been finding it really difficult to balance housework, and spending quality time with my son and my husband. This was really encouraging!

Unknown said...

You are so cute! Love the blog, all your organization tips are awesome. Please check out my sister and I's lifestyle blog!

Brandi said...

I feel a clean house makes me a better wife and mom. When my house is a mess or I'm behind on laundry, I'm a crabby patty and I take it out on my family!!! Great post!

Kasie said...

Thank you for this post! I am a first-time mom to an 8 month old baby girl. Some days go so fast and others can drag on (teething days, for example!). I found your first paragraph to be especially helpful. Thanks for the boost!

Colleen said...

I loved reading this. I'm a working mom too with two little ones. Always nice to see how others manage as well. Your boys are adorable : )

Unknown said...

Thank you for this post and for connecting working mamas! There definitely are not many blogs like this out there so thank you!

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