Monday, May 18, 2009

Questions of the Moment

I get the following questions... Are you going to try again? What are your next steps in trying to have a baby? What did the doctor say? What went wrong? How are you doing?

So I thought that I would take time to answer the pressing questions.

Chad and I have decided for now that we are not trying IVF again. My body needs a break and I think it is okay for us to be sad and take time to get over the failed IVF cycle. I don't want to jump back into IVF at this moment as I am weak and I don't think I would handle the shots and the drive back and forth to Tulsa very well. I was getting tired of the shots and the drive can get old after 12 times going for the past month. I am not saying that we will not try IVF again, but for the moment we are taking a BREAK!

Yes we still want to have a baby, but we want to enjoy life. I want to stop for a moment and not think about IVF or infertility. I want to enjoy my friends and family. I want to be happy again before we try to have a baby. So our next steps are to enjoy life and just maybe we will be blessed sometime this summer. I promise to keep everyone posted on the baby front, but for now we are focusing on each other and the people around us. It is a much needed BREAK!

The visit to our Doctor in Tulsa stated that it is possible for us to have a baby we just need to have more eggs to play with, which means more medicine, and we need better fertilized embryos. Which means instead of a three day transfer we need to get to a five day transfer. They said we can start a new cycle when we are ready, but as I said before we are taking a BREAK!

What went wrong during this cycle? We did not have the best fertilized embryos. That is all that went wrong. He would like us to try IVF again and they would like to adjust medicine and hopefully after the egg and sperm come together we get a fertilized embryos. But at this moment we are taking a much needed BREAK!

How am I doing? I am doing okay. I have good days and bad days. I have the days when I can't believe we spent so much time and effort getting pregnant with a BIG FAT NEGATIVE at the end of our journey. It is sad! Than I have a few days when I don't think about it because my husband Chad helps me get through the day. The reason for the BREAK is that I need to have a positive and happy feeling about the journey of IVF again and know that it will work. For now I don't have those feelings and this is why we are taking a BREAK!

BREAKS are good! Even though I would like to be pregnant and hold a baby in 9 months I am at peace with me decision. This BREAK is what I need. Thank you for the continued support and prayers. I hope all the couples that are trying to conceive a baby have their dreams come true soon!
With love Melissa!

10 comments:

Ashley said...

Im so proud of you! Your attitude is RIGHT ON girl! And you know what, so many people just relax, lay low, and have fun and that's when they have their babies!!! ;) You will totally get pregnant in the next few months, I have no doubts! Enjoy the summer, the sun, barbaques, friends, family... and you will be well on your way! Love you!!!

The Coach's Wife said...

Stay positive! That is the key...and I know it is hard. Next time hopefully we will both get better fertilized embryos and will have our babies one day! Praying for you!

Juls said...

Try to keep your head up....and enjoy of the wonderful things Summer has to offer!!

Best Wishes,

Julie

Anonymous said...

Thinking of you both and we are truly looking forward to spending time with you guys in a couple of days. We love you both.

Kelly said...

You are doing the right thing. I hope you and Chad spend time this summer doing all the things you love. Your baby WILL come!!!!!!

J. Peterson said...

You are a very smart couple. My best friend went through the same thing. After the first try she just needed time, needed her body to heal. After about 5 months they tired one more time, and she had a baby girl.

A women knows, body, mind, and spirit when it feels right.

My prayers to you.

Aminta Price said...

Melissa, I know things will be good. I can't wait to see you and hang out. Please let me know when you have time. We send you a hug and hope to see you soon.

Michelle Cearley said...

I've been on the infertility journey too, and it's hard to take a break, but it's soooo good when you do! You will be very thankful in a few months to feel like yourself and "get your life back" again. One that is not controlled by injections and appointments! I know how hard it is to take a break because you have to get past the feeling that you are giving up trying for a baby, and that you don't have anything exciting that might happen "if it works" this time. But, when I took a break, as sad as I was, it was the very best thing for my marriage and for me. I will be praying for you during this time.

Michelle Cearley
www.cearleyfamily.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

Melissa I love you very much!! I'm glad your giving yourself a very much needed, break! As soon as you let go it will happen I just know it!! Your meant to mommy!! Just remember to stop, breathe and smile everyday, and soon all that tension and pressure will begin to relase and things will fall right into place!! I love you very much and think of you everyday!!

Cary Hairbows said...

Melissa-- I am so behind on reading blogs since we were out of town over the weekend. Just racing in to say you are still in my prayers. HUGS to you!!

I agree, breaks restore. IVF is incredibly demanding to the body. You rest and know that you are loved and prayed for by so many.

xoxo

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